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Point your finger down at the river, dip the point in.
Watch the life-water meander around your docile stump.
Follow the snaking streams of
An unnerving love with a childish gaze.
Trace the double-ended bastard sword of an
Unjust existence; with your eyes.
They can't feel it.
They never do.

Cry a little harder,
Lose sense in your perceptual peons,
Commanded to see the dry rivers of corruption,
Dense with apathetic sabotage.
The work of modern day atheroma terrorists
Hidden under a fleshy, freckled guise.

Go back, to the time when rivers under your skin
Flowed with a great intensity.
When the rhythm rhymed with itself,
Did a little dance, as it pirouetted through your chest.
Remember when the illustrious boom-call of the red, muscular provider made waves;
The poignant needle of life, making its own hole in this pin-board world.
That was when I loved you.

Breathe in,
Take the toke.
Inherit the shorter life-span of your cylindrical friend.
Present the world with your two fingered salute, show it your appreciation.
Let your fuming temptations scorch the seas
As you suck your life
Short.

Kill the dancer,  
I don't love you anymore.
Feed the cancer.
I will breed you forevermore.

Let the enemies of state wage war
On your flooded plains where the end,
Feels naivety shake hands with your slimy riverbank;
Playing the puppeteer with a charred old friend.
Lurch as it settles down to slumber,
Obstructing dreams of a farfetched wonder.
Take this oxbow, long and slender,
And shoot me through this stuttering heart.
Sticky memories of friendly betrayal
Block the handshake from my heart,
But cry me a small tobacco tear
When my seas will finally part.
©2005-2009 ~Nintyman
:iconnintyman:

Author's Comments

This is my first commissioned piece. I was asked by the Principal himself to write a poem about rivers, for an anthology made up of poems from all colleges in our area. It's going to be my first published piece, and all kinds of people are going to be looking at it, so as to make sure that this is my best possible work, I procrastinate the 3 weeks I was given to write it, and start working the night before the deadline. Smart, ey? Well, I hope you all enjoy it.

Comments


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:iconinsanity-streak:
for something you wrote in one night its impressive. i like how you start of describing the river then move onto the lost person that it reminds you of. the analogies in it are awesome too! its so cool you get it published! congrats. but its excellently worded again!! :)

--
Buffy: Angel
Angel: Buffy
Xander: Xander
:iconnintyman:
Thank you, but I've been told that this piece needs to be read a few times to be properly understood. It's not a river that reminds me of someone per se....read it again, you'll get it. Thanks for the kind words.

--
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." - Groucho Marx
:icondagmar-is-sorta-cool:
Aris, that is so freaking awesome. I'm proud of you and I loove you *hugs*

--
--Insert witty, life changing signature here--
:iconinsanity-streak:
ah...... i see now... *falls into place*... i was kinda tired last night when i read it! makes more sense now!

--
Buffy: Angel
Angel: Buffy
Xander: Xander
:icongills77:
this is freaking amazing. i'm favoriting it. and then after that you're going to explain it to me hahahahaha <3 :+fav:
:iconnintyman:
For you, anything! Thanks a lot for the favourite, it means a lot to be favourited by such an awesome person! < 333333

--
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." - Groucho Marx
:iconnintyman:
You're freaking awesomer, and I'm indebted to you for your amazing poem, which inspired me in a way. Inspired me to write and make it good, for you. I looove you too! You awesome thing you! *hugs*

--
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." - Groucho Marx
:iconnintyman:
No worries, I wrote it really late, and even I have trouble understanding what I meant then. Hehe. Oh well. Here's to an understandable poem!

--
"Outside of a dog, a book is a man's best friend. Inside of a dog it's too dark to read." - Groucho Marx
:icondagmar-is-sorta-cool:
No, you're just awesome all on your own. hehe...so cute.

--
--Insert witty, life changing signature here--

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April 19, 2005
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